To Begin

I imagine this whole book writing thing to be a bit like being pregnant. For the past four to six weeks I've been in a near constant state of panic about what is going to happen next. Now I am beginning to nest.
I know all this is happening because I've sent off a draft of the book proposal and first chapter and am anxiously awaiting news. Any kind of news would be great. If I've done it all very well (unlikely) then I'd push forward and begin researching the rest of the book right away. If I've done terribly then it would be back to the drawing board with more focus than ever. I imagine that I will have fallen somewhere in the middle. Each morning I wake up and think, "Will today be the day?" I've hardly ever been so anxious for the phone to ring and have never ever looked forward to getting a fiercely edited draft in the mail. But now I do.
In the meantime I am an organizational maven. Much of this organizing occurs during hours when normal people are not awake, which explains why I still can't seem to find the time to call a long list of family and friends. I have looked through and recycled years worth of Gourmet and Food and Wine Magazines. I have filed piles of articles clipped from the New York Times, Atlantic Monthly, and New Yorker about food, food writing, France, the 1920s, biography, autobiography, and chocolate. I have recycled several trees. I have baked, and baked, and baked. I am getting everything completely ready so that when I hear the good news that the book is a GO I can move ahead. I can begin writing full throttle with all my pens and pencils organized, books all in a row, and a folder labeled for each soon-to-be-written chapter.
If you haven't guessed yet, this silly blog is a part of this anxious organizational fury. If I can't be working on the book, I might as well be working on something. This seems a fairly harmless way of blowing off steam during those times that I am frustrated about my inability to be more productive. We'll see if my verve keeps up once I really do become frantic with work. I can see it going either way. But for now, you must excuse me. The Christmas 2006 Issues of MS Living, Domino, Gourmet & Food and Wine are just begging to be looked through and left to rest in an exceedingly large, increasingly perilous recycling stack.